Hurt
by shinyuy
Summary: Warning - SLASH... yeah deal with it. Casey / Raph. After a fight some things are revealed that weren't expected and sometimes you don't know what to say... because the right words don't work.


Hurt  
By Lil Black Bird aka Shin Yuy  
Parings: Casey/Raph  
Rating: Umm PG 13? Some language and mention of body parts…  
Warnings: SAAAP because it wanted to have saaap, blood, bit o' angst, slash, and un betaed… first time writing for these too ta boot.  
Summary: Sometimes the words you want to say just don't work, because you don't know if they apply.

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Casey didn't move from where he stood on the side of the bed, just looked down at the kneeling turtle who had his face buried in his belly holding him tight, muttering apologies. Casey put his hands on Raph's shoulders, slowly kneading the taut muscles there. Poor kid was scared, scared of what he was doing, where this was going but most of all scared to loose his best friend.

It had been a rough night. Raph and Casey had been on patrol no more than ten minutes when trouble first showed up. They found some punks holding up a late night dinner and followed them until they were a safe distance away before jumping them. They had been pretty pathetic but apparently smart; they called for back up. Back up showed up with lots of numbers and the brawl ended up scaling three streets, two buildings and a hand full of alley ways. Even when they tried to retreat they were hounded. They finally managed to get some distance when they ran into the Purple Dragons doing one of their initiation runs… it just sort of snowballed from there. They came back to his place full of ruckus and adrenalin then while patching each other up had tossed a beer or two on the fire. Casey had left his med kit in his room so they wandered their way back there, rather than dragging themselves back out into the living room like always. Casey worked on Raph first; the turtle had a few good sized cuts, a few scrapes and a new ding to add to his plastron. They joked about how Don and Leo were going to freak out when he got back.

The details were vague in Casey's mind. But somewhere during Raph's turn on Casey he spotted the injury. It was a long slash from a knife, that when asked told had been meant for the turtle, not him. The guy was coming from behind Raph, knife raised high to stab at him at the shoulder, where his shell didn't protect. Casey had shoved Raph out of the way but the knife had gone down, cutting a dark line across his stomach to one side, ending at his hip. It wasn't big enough to need stitches, but it was a near thing. The blow could have maimed, maybe killed Raph had it landed, could have gutted Casey had the guy not lost his footing. He was telling Raph not to worry about it, not to freak out but his best bud had stopped his work and just stared at it, frowning deeply. When he moved again he figured he was leaning closer to look at it, make sure it didn't need stitches.

He had not expected Raph to lick the wound.

Casey hadn't moved, shocked still at the action and just looking down at Raph, who was still kneeling on the bed next to him, bent over his stomach, gauze in one hand, disinfectant pad in the other. He must have taken the lack of movement as some kind of sign because he licked the length of the wound, down to where it disappeared below Casey's belt line. It felt… weird… and nice, but the thing that kept Casey still was how damned erotic it was. He couldn't look away as every wound on his exposed skin was treated the same way. Raph's breath was hot like his tongue, but the wounds were left cold in his passing, the skin tightening when they hit cool air. Casey could hear muttered apologies as the turtle went, 'I'm sorry's puffed against his wet flesh as Raph moved up to the spot on his shoulder, then down his arm to where a big scrape and bruise stood out on his bicep. Casey lifted his arm, touching the side of Raph's face as the turtle leaned back to a kneeling position. Casey watched his pink tongue flick out at the nick on the underside of his wrist, the man's pulse dancing on his tongue.

Casey tugged Raph's face up, to look into the turtle's eyes. They were full of some emotion that sent a shiver down the Casey's spine and went straight to his half hard cock. Worry, fear, and that heated look he used to get from April, once before they seemed to fall into friends rather than boyfriend and girlfriend. Casey had almost forgotten this side of his best bud, the side ruled by compassion rather than rage. He wasn't stupid, he knew this was weird, possibly wrong as hell but he couldn't stop himself from rubbing his thumb against Raph's cheek. He was looking for something, something that scared Casey a little, but not enough to say no.

That's when Casey got up, began to walk away from the bed.

He was going to get something from the bathroom, some ointment that he had taken out of the kit the last time he used it. He hadn't made it to the foot of the bed before he heard this choked whine. He turned to see Raph still sitting there, looking down at the bed and his shoulders beginning to shudder. The human called out his name and was then stuck in the situation he was in now, with a scared teenager grasping at him, holding him in place, apologizing for doing something wrong. It dawned on the man, as he played with the tails of Raph's mask, that walking away like that was not what Raph had been looking for. With a sigh Casey tugged at the mask, making Raph look up at him.

"Hey, what's with the water works?" He smiled as warmly as he could, which came out more of a smirk really. He could see the beginnings of tear stains in the fabric that hid Raph's face. "Quit apologizin' ya goof. You ain't done nothin' wrong." On a whim he pulled the mask off completely, leaving Raph oddly naked. The teen opened his mouth to speak, but stopped when Casey bapped him lightly on the noggin. "Stay where you're at, ya here?" When he got a hesitant nod and was let go, he padded into the bathroom and got what he wanted before moving back into the bedroom. "Help me finish patchin' my dumb ass up and we'll talk ok?"

They worked in silence, putting disinfectant and bandages where it was needed. It didn't take long, with both of them working. Casey kept some kind of contact with Raph the whole time, while Raph seemed to have sunk into one of his brooding moods. When they were done Casey moved to sit against the head board, leaning back onto it without making it hit against the wall. Raph still knelled where he was, watching Casey. When the older man opened his arms, beckoning him over, he scooted closer. As soon as he was in range he was snatched up, pulled down to rest stomach to stomach with Casey, his head against the man's chest. His arms automatically wrapped around the human's waist, holding him close.

"You ok?"

"I look ok to you?" Raph wasn't looking at him, his usually expressive eyes shut. His voice had no heat to it at all, sounding more hurt.

"You wanna talk about it?" Casey ran a hand along Raph's arm and shoulder, trying to help sooth his friend. Looking down at him as he was now he was struck with how much he actually cared for the creature. Raph wasn't just a mutated turtle, more than just a guy he busted heads with. Raph was… well Raph. "Come on I know something is eatin at ya." When the terrapin refused to say anything, mostly because the gears in his brain were working over time, Casey sighed and filled the silence.

"You know once there was this kid I knew, we all called him Dem cuz his name was too long ta call him anything else. Real tough guy like us. He got into fights at school, talked big and all that. He gave me a run for my money one day I tried ta prove I was tougher then he was. Well some time in high school I was walkin' out back behind the gym when I spotted him ducking between the outdoor shed and the building. I followed him, ya know ta see what he was up to. Maybe he was gunna' get in a scrap and I could join in for fun." He looked down to see Raph looking back up at him, listening intently. "I peaked around the corner to see him pushing someone against the wall, kissin' the daylights outa' them. It was like something out of those TV shows where two kids cut class to make out in the dark. I was gunna go when I heard the person he was kissing call out his name. I still remember the shock I had when I realized it was the class vice prez he was making out with. Rowen was his name, real geek kid, kind of quiet and all goody-two-shoes. I knew enough about the birds and the bees to know that one guy on another was weird. I'd seen stuff on the news about gay guys being beat for just bein' who they were. I booked before I got busted, deciding not to say anything cuz I was spyin and all. Apparently I wasn't the only one. Later that week some of the class bullies were pushin' Rowen around, trying to get some secret out of him about how to beat Dem. They were roughin' him up really bad and I couldn't just let them do that to the guy. So I walked in and decided to bust some heads."

"Did you win?" Casey flinched when Raph spoke, his voice was quiet but it rumbled in his chest.

"Na, I got thrashed, but Rowen got out of there." He chuckled at the expression on his friend's face. "What I was still a kid… no older then you against a bunch a seniors twice my size. Anyway when I was in the nurses getting patched up after having to explain to the principal what happened, Dem came ta see me. He wanted ta thank me for watching out for Rowen. I told him I'd seen them together… and I couldn't help but ask why."

"I'm sure that went over good."

"Better than expected. He told me that he'd never met someone who understood him as much as Rowen did. Sure they were different and all, Dem came from the projects and Rowen was bussed in from the boroughs. He couldn't explain it more than… what did he say?" He screwed his face up thinking, and when it came to him looked back down at Raph, holding his eyes in his. "When you get ta know someone, who just knows you like they were you, you don't eva wanna let it go. When you hurt, they hurt. When you're happy, so are they. You don't so much say it out loud as feel it in your gut; see it in their eyes, to know they are special. He told me he didn't understand exactly what drew him to the other boy, just that he needed him like he needed air."

"What happened to them?"

"Rowen got accepted to Harvard or something, but Dem's grades didn't get him in, and his folks couldn't afford it or nothin'. Last I heard from the reunion we had a few years back they were livin up in Boston togetha'."

"That's good for them." Casey watched Raph look away, digesting the story. Leaning down he placed a kiss on the top of Raph's head.

"Hey ya ain't heard the moral of the story." He chided, and when he got Raph's attention again he swallowed and just said his piece, like he always had. "I hurt when you hurt, Raphael. I ain't neva met a guy like you… regardless of the whole species thing, or gender or any a that crap. I hurt for you, cuz I know you, right down to my soul." He hugged the turtle tighter to him, regardless of how it stung his injuries. "So stop sayin you're sorry for feelin what you do, cuz I understand. Don't make sense, but that don't matter none."

Some emotions played across Raph's features before he buried his head in the hollow of Casey's throat, clutching the human tighter. Casey just held on, rubbing up and down his shell, heat not born of arousal or body contact threatening to burn his insides out. Neither spoke, just held on for a good long while. The clock ticked slowly, the sounds of cars in the street passing by in the late hour seemed so distant. Raph's breathing, the little hitch that happened now and again, the thud of his heart against his chest… those were the things that mattered right then. Casey was almost afraid he'd gone to sleep when he finally spoke up, voice thick with emotion.

"I… I…" Casey could see he was trying to get the words out, knew which three he wanted to say but just couldn't get them out. Casey beat him to the punch, putting a calloused finger to Raph's lips.

"I know ya do, Raphie." He smiled, and Raph finally saw what he was looking for in Casey and smiled a bit back. "I know."

Outside it was getting brighter, even as it began to drizzle out. Soon Raph would either have to go home, or crash with him for the day. The evening's activities were already taking their toll on both of them. Raph was heavy against his body, the tension he'd been holding since that first moment in the room finally leaving his shoulders. Casey was sore as hell and sleepy himself. He laughed at the huge yawn the turtle let loose before snuggling down, breathing in Casey's scent. Casey Jones thought this was the craziest thing he had ever done in his life, and it would only get more complicated as time went on. But he knew the facts, the simple truth of the situation and that was enough for him.

"Get some sleep, knucklehead. It's been a long night."

"I should be… yawn goin though." Raph glanced at the clock, watching the little numbers click over to some obscene time in the morning.

"If your bro's call we'll tell them you're crashin' out here for the day. I'm sure Splinter won't mind you gettin' some actual rest." Casey fished Raph's shell cell out from its hiding spot and put it on the night stand near the bruise ointment and the now warm beers.

"You sure?" Raph was giving him that confused, wounded look he had been earlier. Casey decided if he could do anything right in his life, he'd make Raph forget how to make that face.

"Dumb ass, course I don't." Casey reached over and snagged part of the blanket off his bed, pulling it over both of them. "Now shut up and get some shut eye."

Raph gave him one of his usual, 'Case is being stupid', looks before closing his eyes, following orders for once. Casey knew his back would kill him later, but it didn't matter. Having Raph right there, safe, warm, and more or less content, that's what mattered. He said a silent prayer to whatever deity had reminded him of that story, giving him the words he wouldn't have had on his own. Heaving a sigh and getting as comfortable as he could, Casey closed his eyes to sleep too. For a while all was quiet, then he felt Raph move, shifting to look at him as he feigned sleep. He felt cool lips against his neck before Raph settled down again.

"I hurt for you too, Casey Jones."

END

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And this all spawned from the idea of Raph licking Casey's wounds… mmm bloody lovins.


End file.
